Hag Stone Journal

Favorite Things

Favorite Things

018
January 20 to 26
In This Issue: Journal Prompt, Meditation, Home, Outdoors, Community, Body, Magic, Poem, Craft, Cookery, Moon Phases, Activism, Recommendations, Next Week

During the year I was approaching 40, I made it my goal to spend time figuring out what I really like and to challenge some old assumptions about what I don’t like. It was kind of an adventure to really take stock and notice what I felt about what I was inviting into my life and what I was spending my time on. When I was 41, my goal, or theme, for the year was: Know Thyself. I explored what was the right amount of sleep for me, what kind exercise I really liked (rather than just endured), and what my favorite flavor of ice cream was (still mint chip?). I felt like it was worthwhile to spend time tuning into how I really feel and noticing what I really like, maybe because I wasn’t sure whether what I thought I liked was still accurate, or ever was.

It is a process I am still working on now. I am still refining my tastes. I’ve found that I don’t like scary movies as much as I used to, except the not-that-scary ones from the 70s and 80s. I still get very overstimulated by crowds, so big, popular events with lots of people, even if they are very very cool, are more likely to be endured rather than enjoyed. And my favorite pen is the Pilot Precise V5 Extra Fine, in blue or black.

I enjoy finding out when my likes or dislikes change. Every so often I revisit things I didn’t like, in case my tastes have changed. When I was younger I didn’t like orange marmalade. I thought it tasted bitter. Now it is one of my favorite toast toppings. It is exciting when new favorites are discovered.

Personally, I always have a hard time narrowing down my all-time favorite book or song. I have too many! But I can usually answer, “What is your favorite book that you’ve read recently?” I can pinpoint what my favorite is right now– not something that I enjoyed in the past or was meaningful to me in 6th grade, but something I’m glad is part of my life now.

You can always get new favorites or bring back old favorites; part of the fun is just exploring.
Get to know yourself and what you like. It is another way to invite small moments of happiness, joy, magic, and sacred into our daily lives.

One of my favorite things about walking in winter is that the trees are bare and I can see more of the houses in my neighborhood when I go on my daily walks. I admire the architecture as well as the gardens, front doors, mailboxes, and other charming details of a home. I have several favorite houses in my neighborhood, and I have shared pictures of them throughout this issue. Some are big and fancy and others are small and charming. Some have interesting windows, or slate roofs, or pretty trim, or charming ivy, or pretty shutters. Usually it is the small details that make a house, and a life, magical.


By Heather Gray

Journal Prompt

What are some of your favorites?
Color?
Scent?
Outdoor smell? (Mine are pine in the winter and fresh cut grass in the summer.)
Breakfast?
Way to prepare eggs?
Dessert?
Pie?
Thing to spread on toast?
Cocktail? (If you don’t know, it could be fun to figure it out)
Thing to put in a hot toddy?
Fabric to wrap yourself in?
Place to sit in your home?
Coffee mug?
View from a window in your home?
Scented candle?

After you have answered the last five, you’ll have to wrap yourself in your favorite fabric or blanket, sit in your favorite chair or at your window with your favorite view, light your favorite scented candle, drink coffee from your favorite mug, and enjoy the moment under a pile of favorites.

Meditation


I developed one of my favorite meditations this summer, and I would practice it first thing in the morning, outside in my garden.

I start by sitting or standing. While looking around at where I am, I take a deep breath in and then exhale.
I close my eyes and take another deep breath in and out. On my third breath, I tune into my body and feel where I am holding tension. With my fourth inhale and exhale, I release the tension I am holding. And I slowly open my eyes on my fifth breath.

If I was standing, I sit now and set a five minute timer. For five minutes, I focus on my natural breathing. As distracting thoughts come up, I bring my focus back to how my breathing feels on my nose, in my throat, chest, stomach.
When the alarm indicates that I have been meditating for five minutes, I stand up and stretch, reaching my fingers up high, standing on my tiptoes, and then gently bending at the waist and touching my toes. I wiggle my waist and twist my hips, just getting my body moving and alive.

Next, I set a short mantra for the day, something like:
“I trust myself. I trust the universe. I am guided by grace.”

Then I express gratitude:
“I give thanks for all my experiences, like…” and name a few experiences, including challenging ones.

Then I set my intention for the day; it comes to me from something I am struggling with, something I am excited about, or something I am grateful for.

Lastly, I smell something that wakes up my senses and gets me ready to start the day. In the summer, I would smell a leaf from our big sage bush. In winter, I inhale the aroma of one of my other favorite scents, lavender.

Craft


Embroidery is my current favorite handicraft. There are so many cool feminist, punk rock, aesthetic embroidery patterns out there, I have a never-ending list of embroidery projects to work on. I also like to make my own patterns. I am not that great yet, but I still think my attempts are charming. Last year I challenged myself to embroider a piece for every month of the year. I started in January, and you can too.

You can design your own or search online for “January embroidery” and see if any of the results inspire you. I hang my Embroidery of the Month in the kitchen, above the calendar. Sometimes I forgot and didn’t get to October until it was almost Halloween, but now I have finished and I do have one for each month.

Cookery


My husband is a big fan of chef Alton Brown, he loves the science and engineering Alton brings to his recipes. I love how Alton spends times tweaking his recipes so they become more and more to his taste. For example, he updated his hot cocoa recipe in his new series; over the years he has figured out how to make one of his favorites recipes even more his favorite.

I don’t always like when we change our recipes, especially one that is my favorite. But what if it could be even better? I love that this recipe uses dry milk powder. This way I can easily just heat water in the kettle, rather than steaming milk on the stove, and still have that wonderful creamy hot chocolate that we all prefer. So here is Alton Brown’s, and now our, favorite homemade hot cocoa recipe:

Ingredients:
2 cups confectioners’ sugar
1 cup unsweetened cocoa powder, preferably Dutch process
2.5 cups nonfat dry milk powder
2 teaspoons cornstarch
1 teaspoon fine-grain salt
1 pinch ground cayenne pepper (optional)
Hot water to serve

Instructions:
Combine confectioner’s sugar, cocoa powder, milk powder, salt, cornstarch, and cayenne (optional) in a large bowl and mix. Or put in a large airtight container and shake vigorously to combine.

Place 2 tablespoons of mix into a mug and add 2 fluid ounces of hot water to it. Stir to combine. Then fill the mug the rest of the way up with hot water.

Experiment with different amounts of hot cocoa mix. Try filling the mug halfway with mix and half with water. Add marshmallows. If you didn’t use cayenne, try sprinkling some over one cup.

Shake or stir mix prior to each use so you get all the flavors. This mix will keep in an airtight container for a year.

Home

The Vanna Venturi House

Marie Kondo, the tidying guru, has a new show streaming on Netflix: The Art of Tidying. Although I never read her 2015 bestselling book, I decided to check out the show because I gathered that she teaches people to keep things in their homes that “spark joy” and to let go of what doesn’t. I thought it might be in alignment with this week’s theme of Favorite Things.

Marie Kondo has a specific tidying method and philosophy called the KonMari method. She recommends tidying by item (clothes, books, papers, etc.) rather than by room, and moving through the items in a certain order that, she says, will teach you how to tune into what brings you joy and what does not.

For example, on The Art of Tidying, she has people begin by taking every item of their clothing and piling it on their bed and then going through each item one by one, holding it in their hands and feeling if it “sparks joy”, or if they want to bring it forward into their future life. This process can be very hard for people for many reasons. Maybe they don’t like any of their clothes. Maybe they feel like clothes are utilitarian and not something that can “spark joy”. Maybe they are very sentimental about old clothes that don’t fit them. But, on the show at least, everyone eventually has a breakthrough and is able to make some decisions about their clothing. They then fold and hang, in a specific tidy KonMari way, everything they are keeping.

One of the things I didn’t understand when I had only heard about the book but hadn’t read it, is that the KonMari philosophy isn’t about throwing away things you care about. You don’t have to become a minimalist to be tidy. And, in the show, Marie Kondo doesn’t pressure anyone to get rid of sentimental objects or worn sweatpants, she just guides you to make conscious decisions about what you own, to be purposeful about the things you choose to keep around you. She then teaches you how to store them in a way that help you stay organized.

My family was really inspired by the new show. My husband and I took everything out of our kitchen cupboards and piled it in the middle of the floor and then went through it all, item by item. We ended up removing two large boxes of things from the kitchen. I love my kitchen so much more now that everything has a place and it is easy and convenient to get to it all, and I know where everything is and that I want to use it.

My daughter found out that she thinks folding clothes is relaxing. She refolded all the clothes in her dresser, using the KonMari method, and now has much more room in her drawers and knows where everything is.

This week, you could KonMari all your clothes (Marie Kondo always starts people with clothes and has them begin by make a decision about clothing they know they love) or you could pick one area of your home, like the dining table or your entryway, pile everything up in the center of the room, and then touch each item and decide if you want to keep it or not. Do you really love it? Do you need it in your life? If not, say “Thank you,” to the item for what it has given you, and then gently release it into a trash bag or donation box.


A hot water bottle is one of my favorite items to help me stay cozy and warm in the winter. It is a kind of charmingly old-fashioned feel to fill up a rubber hot water bottle from the tap (the water should but hot but not boiling), wrap it in a towel, and place it under the blankets at the foot of the bed before I get ready to go to sleep. Then, when I get under the covers, it is all roasty-toasty and very comforting.

A hot water bottle is also nice for sore muscles, cramps, and various aches and pains. And you can knit or sew a little cozy sweater for your hot water bottle as a winter craft.

Outdoors

This is probably my favorite house in the neighborhood. Notice all the wonderful details the builder put in.

Around the edges of the roof, the chimney, and the windows, they used a grey stone, different from the rich reddish brown stones that dominate the look. They also use red brick as a detail under the windows, and in four curved arches over the red door. The gate to the front walk is quite ornate, as is the wall it is attached to. This is not the largest house in the neighborhood, the footprint is quite compact, but the attention to detail and storybook sweetness make it my favorite.

This week, while on your walk or commute, notice some of your favorite things of what you see. Look for the details, like a brightly painted front door, custom mailboxes, picturesque garden, trees, or even your favorite window.

“Will you look at that window?” he said.
I looked. It is a tallish window with an arched top. On the sill inside stood a straggly late hyacinth with its white roots growing in water, a jam jar of tadpoles and a hedgehog.
“It’d be nice to paint,” I said.
“I was just thinking that. If I were a painter I believe I’d always paint windows.”
I looked up at the inn. “There’s another for you,” I told him. Close to the swinging signboard with its crossed gold keys there was a diamond-paned lattice open, showing dark red curtains and a little sprigged jug and bain, with the brass knob and black rail of an iron bedstead behind. It was wonderfully paintable.
“Everywhere one turns–” He stared all around, as if he were trying to memorize things.”

-“I Capture the Castle” by Dodie Smith

Magic

One of my favorite forms of magic is combining my mind, my heart, and my will to form a powerful intention. I am very careful with the words I say, think, and write, because I believe in the power of words. I believe the words we choose create our lives. When we say a lot of negative things, they can create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Now, I don’t believing in blaming people for the bad things that happen, as if they attracted it to themselves by using negative words. I don’t think there is anything I did or said that caused me to get breast cancer in 2010. We all have many good and bad experiences in our lives, and there is no way we can ward off all negative experiences with the power of positive thinking. Words won’t protect us from all tragedy, but the words we choose to tell our own stories can be healing, loving, and wise. The words we use to tell the stories of our experiences and the words we use to wish upon our future are very important. In some ways, it is like all words are magical words.

It can be a very potent practice to set an intention every day during morning meditation. Intentions gain power as we repeat them throughout the day. For example, set your intention while you are still lying in bed in the morning, and then repeat it during morning meditation, in your regular journal or bullet journal, and while you are commuting to work.
One of the places from which I get the words for my intentions is my daily tarot practice. I interpret the cards to apply to whatever is going on in my life or in my mind, and then, if I can come up with a good message, I set an intention from those cards. Here is an example of three intentions I was inspired to create from my tarot practice:

“I don’t have to explain or justify living by my values. I am free to be as I am.”

“Trust myself and trust the universe.”

“Move in the direction that inspires me and know I can manifest it in reality.”

I invite you to try this powerful practice this week and set a positive intention for yourself, carefully choosing your words, using your heart, mind, and will and connecting to a part of yourself and the universe that wants the best for you.

Moon Phases

January 20 and 21 are the full moon.

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Cream-colored ponies and crisp apple strudels
Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Silver white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things

When the dog bites, when the bee stings
When I’m feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don’t feel so bad

Community

Host a gathering based around one of your favorite things, like Burns Night, a Galentine’s Day gathering, an Oscar party, a poetry salon, or a potluck chili party. What is something you love and want to share with your friends? Host a party with that as the theme.

Activism

Monday, January 21st, is Martin Luther King Jr. Day. All over the country, folks will be bringing their hearts and hands to a Day of Service in their cities and towns. Philadelphia has one of the largest MLK Day of Service events in the nation. The Day of Service theme for the city of brotherly love is A World Without Gun Violence.

All over our country, schools, colleges, churches, work places, and civil institutions have organized ways for volunteers to serve their community. One place you can connect to in order to find ways to serve this MLK Day is the federal agency for national and community service.

Recommendations

This poetry podcast was recommended to me by a friend as one of her favorite ways to start her day:

Every weekday, U.S. Poet Laureate Tracy K. Smith delivers a different way to see the world – through poetry. Produced in partnership with the Library of Congress and the Poetry Foundation.

Anglecot

Next Week

We explore the magic and sacred of Imbolc, the Gaelic festival halfway between the winter solstice and the spring equinox.